Monday, June 29, 2009

To boat or not to boat?


Boat: (bōt) noun. A hole in the water
into which all money is thrown.

But man, I want one! I want my own money-sucking hole!

We went boating yesterday with some friends from my husband's work, and it was a blast. The weather wasn't perfect, but the company sure was. I think MacDaddy and I are hooked. We're like boat crack addicts. It's all we think about. We can't wait to get our next fix. We're exhibiting boat-seeking behavior, and we'll ask anyone where we can score a boat. We say we can quit, but we really don't want to. We'll surely need a 12-step program so that it doesn't take over our lives.

Here are 10 things I learned whilst boating:
  1. Flip flops are not boating shoes.

  2. You don't "park" out in the water, you "anchor."

  3. If you can't figure out how to tie your boat to the dock so that it doesn't float way, you probably shouldn't get a boat.

  4. If you don't drink beer, you definitely shouldn't get a boat.

  5. If you can't *wait* to get back on the boat, you probably should get a boat.

  6. If you're fussy about your hair, you don't belong on a boat.

  7. The bathroom is not called the bathroom. It's the "head." And men seem to dig it when you talk about "head."

  8. The kitchen is not the kitchen, it's the galley. And it's main purpose is to hold...the beer.

  9. Don't fuck around on radio channel 16, it's for the Coast Guard, and they'll kick your ass if you fuck around on it.

  10. Boating doesn't suck!

So, anyone know where I can score a boat? C'mon man, help a gal out!


--Mom

5 comments:

The Diva on a Diet said...

Beer and head, what's not to love? I'm voting: BOAT!

Debbie said...

That does sound like fun! Go for it.

~~Mel~~ said...

Having a boat really isn't for me...it seems like so much work and money...but I'd love to have a friend with a boat! lol.

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