Monday, May 18, 2009

Show me the money! I mean it.

I saw an interesting article on CNN today. The headline is "Ten Creative Ways to Earn Extra Money." I clicked of course, because who couldn't use some extra money in this economy? The way all our 401ks are likely performing, we'll need to work until we're friggin' 107!

Well, here's what I found, and I'm not sure I'm down with a number of items on this list. Tell me what you think.

1. Do freelance work.
Is this secret code for selling dope or prostitution? And I wonder which would net me more money?

2. Sell your books.
When I first read it, I thought it said "Sell your boobs" and it made me think that #1 must mean drugs, so #2 meant prostitution--covering both bases and all. But now I see it says "books" and I don't really think my books are all that fabulous. My boobs tho...

3. Search circulating coinage.
The article said to look for old coins that you might have lying around. Hahahaha! If you have kids, you probably don't have any spare money lying around. Even Baby scombs onto spare change. Nice try!

4. Start a "business."
"Business" seems a little suspicious, don't you think? Why would it be in quotes? Is this about the boobs and drugs again?

5. Enter local and online sweepstakes.
I wonder if blog contests count?

6. Give your opinion -- and get paid (online surveys, phone surveys and product trials).
For the love of GOD, that's what I've been doing for YEARS!! I give my opinion on damn near everything to damn near anyone who will listen, and no one, I mean NO ONE has given me a dime for it. So scratch that off your list. It doesn't work. I call bullshit!

8. Join a direct selling company (Avon, Pampered Chef).
Yeah, OK. Whatever!

9. Be a secret shopper.
I've been secretly shopping for YEARS. I buy shit and secretly sneak it into the house and my husband never knows! I'm currently wearing a pair of khaki pants that were purchased secretly. The phrase, "What, these old things?!" was MADE for secret shoppers! There's no money in that either.

10. Sell your photos to stock agencies.
This one has me a bit confused. Do they mean scenic photos of my beautiful state, or the Polaroids taken before we were married?

From the looks of the list, boobs and drugs are really the only way to make a buck in this economy. So...good luck!


msprimadonna67 said...

Hilarious list!

KatBouska said...

I've GOT it!! Sell a how to book on drugs and prostitution!!! Shall we partner up?? Now slap on your wire fire bra and get to "work"!!

Anonymous said...

You're hilarious, Mom.


Candice said...

I can vouch that there IS good money in prostitution assuming you know how to do it right.

Gotta go. I need to go to CVS for my new prescription for antibiotics and Valtrex.

Veronica Lee said...

LOL, you are a hoot!

Unknown said...

The ridiculous hints and tips I've seen lately....altho this is the best list so far.

I wonder if CNN money - no this couldnt possibly have come from there???? - has tried to sell used books lately?

I'm making 10's of cents doing it on ebay


Maureen said...

Ahahaha! Yet another useless list.

Seems there are a lot of those lately.

Mom said...

Hi everyone! Thanks for stopping by!

The How-To lists...yeah, they're generally pretty useless, aren't they?!

Mama Kat--You're on! And after our book deal, we can do seminars.

Candice--Good luck with that infection...errr, job!

Tracy--Try selling boobs instead. LOL

Blogger said...

Find out how THOUSAND of individuals like YOU are earning their LIVING from home and are living their wildest dreams right NOW.

Blogger said...

Just got my check for $500.

Many times people don't believe me when I tell them about how much money you can earn by taking paid surveys online...

So I show them a video of myself getting paid $500 for filling paid surveys.

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