Friday, August 20, 2010

5 for Friday...wacky school supplies

Yesterday I did school supply shopping with Bella and Baby, so today's 5 for Friday is going to be about the return to school and the "5 strangest things I've ever seen on my childrens' school supply list." So here goes...

5. One box of gallon baggies and one box of two-gallon baggies. I assumed it would be for bringing projects home, but I never saw a single one of those baggies ever come back home. So, what was the purpose? Let's do a little math...

12 two-gallon baggies + 20 gallon bags = 32 bags x 25 kids = 800 baggies.

Wow. That's an ass load of baggies. Is she dealing weed?

4. 12 Elmer's glue sticks, not purple. Ok first, why not purple? Everyone knows it dries clear, so what's the big deal? And twelve?! Let's do some more math...

12 glue sticks x 25 kids = 300 glue sticks.

Raise your hand if you think 250 of those sticks are going to be dry as a bone by Christmas?

3. 2 blue folders, 2 red folders, 2 yellow folders, 2 green folders. All with pockets and brads; smooth cover, not plastic; no business card slots. Wow, that's some pretty specific supply requesting. Talk about stress! Must...get...the...right...kind...

2. Alpha Bits cereal. Really? The kids are going to spell with it, or glue it onto projects? Uh-huh. How about NOT. I knew full well that they're going to EAT it by the handfuls, because that's what kids do. And the thought of kids touching each others' Alpha Bits cereal freaks me right the fuck out. I don't know what year Bella needed it, but I'm sure it was the year that she was sick a lot. From touching and eating each other's germs. Here are some Alpha Bit letters for the teacher that requested that... D.U.M.B.A.S.S.

1. Shaving cream. That was back when Bella was in 2nd grade and my original thought, which still stands today: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THAT?! How stoned and/or stupid do you have to be to want a room full of 7 years olds with shaving cream?! And for what purpose?! Why not just ask for silly string? Or a big bucket of mud?

So tell me, have you had any crazy items on your kids' school supply list? Or is it just me?



The Diva on a Diet said...

Its the end of August ... let the school supply bitching begin!

800 baggies?! What the ever loving fuck?

Though .. Alpha Bits and shaving cream ... good times, good times!

~~Mel~~ said...

Nothing too strange on the boy's supply list this year...but they are recommending deodarant...that kind of freaks me out a boy can't be THAT old...can he??? LOL

Elissa Newton said...

Hey I loved when they asked me for a crib sheet. OK my kids 5. What the heck!

Mom said...

Diva, you know I love a good school supply bitch!

Mel, for the greater good...send the deodorant! LOL

Elissa, a crib sheet? For the love of God, why?! That's pretty whack.

Unknown said...

Holy cow! That is a lot of baggies! And glue sticks. I prefer the purple glue sticks. I wonder why she dislikes those?
Perhaps they dry out quicker... : )

Veronica Lee said...

Over here, on this side of the pond, our kids are given a list of Activity and practice books. Text books were in the list too until the government started to supply public schools with the books a few years ago. LOL! No shaving cream on the list!!!

The Diva on a Diet said...

LOVE your chic new banner, Mom! Especially the purse and that ring. So cool!

The Blonde Duck said...

How can they request that stuff?

Brandy said...

My nephew needs 20 glue sticks for school this year. TWENTY. What in the hell are they gluing? The oil well in the gulf?!

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