I'm a grown ass woman

I have a husband, a job, a home, a business, two cars and a dog. But the thing that's suddenly made me feel like an adult is that both my widely-spaced offspring are now in school. Truthfully, it makes me feel old as hell because I have feelings of overwhelmedness on opposite ends of the spectrum.

With Bella going to high school, I'm all "OMG, ONLY FOUR MORE YEARS LEFT!!!"

And with Baby, I'm all "OMG, WE'RE JUST NOW STARTING SCHOOL ALL OVER AGAIN!!!"

I know it all goes so quickly and one day I'll be sitting in my rocking chair wondering where my kids are, where period went and why my boobs are in my lap. I wish I could stop time right where it is. I need Superman to reverse the earth's rotation.

I'm wearing them. I promise.
But they're getting in a bunch.

--Mom

WTF Wednesday: ADD = aluminum deficit disorder?

Why don't my people know how to work tin foil? They're not clear on how plastic wrap is supposed to work either, as demonstrated by the occasional dry spots on the cheddar cheese. WTF?! Does this only happen at my house?

--Mom