Yesterday I did school supply shopping with Bella and Baby, so today's
5 for Friday is going to be about the return to school and the
"5 strangest things I've ever seen on my childrens' school supply list." So here goes...
5. One box of gallon baggies and one box of two-gallon baggies. I assumed it would be for bringing projects home, but I never saw a single one of those baggies ever come back home. So, what was the purpose? Let's do a little math...
12 two-gallon baggies + 20 gallon bags = 32 bags x 25 kids = 800 baggies.
Wow. That's an ass load of baggies. Is she dealing weed?
4. 12 Elmer's glue sticks, not purple. Ok first, why not purple? Everyone knows it dries clear, so what's the big deal? And twelve?! Let's do some more math...
12 glue sticks x 25 kids = 300 glue sticks.
Raise your hand if you think 250 of those sticks are going to be dry as a bone by Christmas?
3. 2 blue folders, 2 red folders, 2 yellow folders, 2 green folders. All with pockets and brads; smooth cover, not plastic; no business card slots. Wow, that's some pretty specific supply requesting. Talk about stress! Must...get...the...right...kind...
2. Alpha Bits cereal. Really? The kids are going to spell with it, or glue it onto projects? Uh-huh. How about NOT. I knew full well that they're going to EAT it by the handfuls, because that's what kids do. And the thought of kids touching each others' Alpha Bits cereal freaks me right the fuck out. I don't know what year Bella needed it, but I'm sure it was the year that she was sick a lot. From touching and eating each other's germs. Here are some Alpha Bit letters for the teacher that requested that... D.U.M.B.A.S.S.
1. Shaving cream. That was back when Bella was in 2
nd grade and my original thought, which still stands today: ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THAT?! How stoned and/or stupid do you have to be to want a room full of 7 years
olds with shaving cream?! And for what purpose?! Why not just ask for silly string? Or a big bucket of mud?
So tell me, have you had any crazy items on your kids' school supply list? Or is it just me?
--
Mom
This falls into that category known as so ugly only a mother could love it...'cept not me. This little fabric guy is named Bed Head and appears to be the love child of Sock Monkey...
and the tribal voodoo doll from the movie "Trilogy of Terror."
The Etsy write up about him says that he's "patched together with various recycled fibers" (recycled from WHAT is what I'd like to know?) and his "belly has a stone from lake michigan inside" (I don't know why!) and "good wishes come from this." I have serious doubts about that though. In my opinion, I feel nightmares might come from this.
